Tag Archives: Family

Thought From a Chronic Isolater

There are two sides to me; depressant and anti-depressant.

The depressant side manifests itself through isolation. Isolation is attractive because it seems so protective, and so secure. But, it only feeds my depressive state. The only thing that proves isolation safety to be a lie is being aware that I am an isolater.

Isolation can be so deceptive. Why? Because it does not require physical absence. I wished I could offer some words of wisdom on how to defeat the depressant side but, I can not.

However, I hold on to this truth. The valley in the center of a wave resides between two peaks. Therefore, I only have to look up to find my anti-depressant. Seratonin be damned! Guess, I better get climbing.

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A Refugee is My Displaced Neighbour

How did Christ define the word “Neighbour (Plesion Grk.)? “According to Christ, any other human irrespective of nation or religion with whom we live or whom we chance to meet” is our neighbour. By the very nature of the word “Refugee” I would say we all, Christian or not, stand a chance to meet our displaced neighbour.  The meeting itself, where it is or when it is, is not the issue. How we act toward our neighbor when we meet, is.

When Christ implored me to “Love my neighbour as I loved myself” it caused me great pains. Why?  The biggest reason, I didn’t love myself, therefore loving my neighbor wasn’t possible.  The other reason, I had no idea who my neighbour was.  Oh! I knew the couple that lived next door to me and those living on my block.  But, does the “human neighbourhood” really stop there?  Sometimes I find myself thinking so small, like I am in my own little world.  For the longest time I defined my “Neighbor” as someone who liked me, thought like me, liked what I liked, someone that believed how I believed, and of course my neighbor had to make me feel safe. What a narrow and fearful mindset. In order to overcome my fearful mindset I heeded the words of the Apostle John. John said, “There is no fear in love, but perfect love casts out fear, because fear is by suspicion, but he who fears is not grown up in love.” (1 John 4:18 AB)

My relationship with Christ, and after having spent months imbedded with Muslims as a Military Advisor has helped changed the narrow and fearful paths my mind used to travel. Loving our neighbor, a human being made in God’s Image, may not be convenient and may not be easy.  However, I do not think Christ would have commanded us to do so if it wasn’t worth it.  Christ never hesitated to accept and love me.  When I came to know Him I was a refugee from a nation of unbelief. Now, as I glance over the media’s usage of the word “refugee” the love of Christ (Perfect Love) blocks out those letters and replaces them with “Neighbour.”

As a Christian the directive, right, and privilege to love perfectly is inherently ours. The decision to allow fear to overpower perfect love is generated by the opposite of Grace.  Yet both are still a decision.

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Unwanted and Unsolicited

This is a friendly reminder of a law that was signed by President George W. Bush in 2003. This Law is called the CAN-SPAM act of 2003. This law was designed to stop the barrage of unsolicited marketing emails inundating our personal email accounts. These type of emails are called SPAM. This is a bit different from the “Spam” I grew up with. The Spam I grew up with was a wonderful concoction of delicious pork pieces. I became very fond of this product. The difference between the Spam I enjoy and the SPAM I don’t is a matter of choice. I consciously choose the tasty pork loaf, however, I did not choose to be slammed with a million emails. Emails, whose only purpose is to tempt me to purchase or subscribe to something which provides nothing fruitful or uplifting. Spamming is actually a subversive attempt at mind control. Did you know that Satan is a “Spammer?” He SPAMs by slamming our minds with unsolicited negative thoughts.

Friends, don’t lose hope, and don’t lose heart. When it comes to unwanted SPAM we do have a choice. Because of the CAN-SPAM Act, by-law an “Unsubscribe” or “Opt-Out” button must appear on any unsolicited email or electronic advertisement. Yes! Great freedom comes from clicking the unsubscribe button. It isn’t easy to find, it is usually at the bottom portion of the email and is often in very fine print. I do not covet power on a regular basis, but in this instance, it feels pretty good to shoot down menacing advertisements with one click of the mouse. Ok, sometimes it takes two clicks.

In the Bible, the Apostle Paul actually talks about “unsubscribing.” However, Paul hopes we would be strong enough to unsubscribe from unsolicited negative thoughts. In Philippians 4:8-9 Paul gives us a list of things to mediate on. Things like: Love, Truth, Holiness, Righteousness, Nobility, Purity, and Virtue.” When we mediate on these things we subconsciously unsubscribe from their polar opposites. Sure, it takes some effort on our part to meditate on these things, especially since we are bombarded everyday with their opposites. But, if we do as Paul asks great mental weights are lifted off of our minds. Remember, whether it is an unwanted email or unsolicited thought we always have the choice to “Unsubscribe.” Take charge of your thoughts, you are the only one that can.

 

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Unmet Expectations: Don’t Let Them Chase Hope Away.

My house used to have a closet with a locked door. I know this because I locked it. Prior to closing off this part of my house I used it for the storage of vibrant and wonderful things. The most radiant thing I used to hang in this closet was hope. When hope was in the closet of my house the door was never closed. Each day I welcomed hope with open arms and open mind. I felt such comfort and peace having hope in my house. Then one day hope packed its bags and left. Why did hope leave? Where did it go? Upon noticing hope was gone, I ran frantically through my house looking for hope. I burst through the front door and feverishly combed my property looking for hope, but hope wasn’t to be found. I sat for a moment to collect my thoughts, all the while wondering, where did hope go? Finally, I resigned myself to thinking hope may never return. I became angry and that is when I shut and locked the closet door. I, and no one else closed the door to hope.

Now, years later, I discovered what happened to hope. You see, hope got tired, tired of watching me in agony. “What agony,” you ask? Well it seems, year after year unmet expectations kept piling up in the living room of my house. Every day, when hope was in my house I insisted on taking it for a walk past the living room. Hope noticed the sadness in my eyes as I obsessed about the ever growing pile of my unmet expectations. Finally, hope could stand it no longer, it packed up its belongings and left.

After being without hope for a while, I began to think, maybe I should unlock the closet within my house just in case hope desires to return. I really wanted to make hope feel like it was welcomed to return. I unlocked the door and pushed it open. When the closed door was opened light cast itself across the floor, and in the light I noticed a handwritten note. Here is what the note said:

“I hated to leave but you left me no choice. I truly loved the days when you would greet me and embrace me each and every day. But, when you started obsessing about unmet expectations, and forgetting about me I had no choice. I’m hope, and I can’t stay where I am not the center of your attention. I promise, one day, I will return. When you want and desire me more than your unmet expectations, then, I will return. Sincerely Yours – HOPE!”

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Remembering the Benefits of God

I remember the multiple times in my life I sought employment. Each time the most important factor for accepting a job offer was the amount of quality benefits. Benefits like health insurance, sick leave, vacation time, education, promotion potential, and a good working environment. I was raised to focus more on benefits, than on the hourly wage. Why? Because the lack of substantial benefits consumes a large portion of the hourly wage. I truly appreciate the lesson my parents taught me concerning a need for quality benefits.

Until recently, I really never stopped to realize how the “benefits” lesson related to my spiritual life. Specifically, how it affected the efficacy of my prayers. I often prayed to my Father (God) without first considering the multitude of His quality benefits. Benefits like, to name a few, the sacrifice of His Son for my salvation, His Grace, His Mercy, The Gift of His Spirit, His Truth, His Word, His Forgiveness, His Redemption, and most important His Love. I used to always open my prayers with “God, I need this” and “God, I need that.” Or “Please, God change this” and “Change him or her.” It wasn’t until I walked with King David through his Psalms that I began to pray to God with first, his gracious benefits in mind. Now, I do my best to preface my prayers with; “Bless the Lord, O my soul, and forget not all his benefits.” (Psalm 103:2) Opening prayer with true praise and a thankful heart helps me focus fully on God’s gratuitous nature. From there He willingly fulfills my needs, as well as my heart’s desires.

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God’s Track Record

Sometimes learning to trust can be hard. I often wonder, why do I project the mistrust I have of certain people upon God? He’s never left me nor forsaken me. When am I going to realize that faith in God is an unbridled and bareback ride through the wilderness, with no concern of what’s over the next rise. If I believe and have faith God is with me on this side of the hill, then by faith I can believe God is on the other side waiting for me just the same. Having unbridled faith in God is a sign of complete trust in God. God can’t work in and through me if I don’t or won’t trust him completely. How can I know he is trustworthy? In Psalm 22:4 King David tells me, “Our fathers trusted in You; They trusted, and You delivered them. They cried to You, and were delivered; They trusted in You, and were not ashamed.” Wow! With a track record like God’s I have no cause for distrust.

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Free Will

One day, after an extremely poor choice on my part I asked God a question. I asked, God, why did you give me free will? Immediately God said, “No real conscious choice can be made without free will.” James, he said, “Like it or not, “love” is a free will choice. Take away free will and “love” becomes a mechanical notion. I don’t want my children to love me because they have to; I want them to love me because they have chosen freely to do so. It’s all in the choice.”

Upon hearing this I thought: God’s gift of free will isn’t a curse, it’s a cure. Free will is actually a blessing, it gives me the power to choose. Sure, it introduces a dilemma between spirit and flesh. It has too, without this dilemma there would be no sacrifice. God modeled free will choice when he decided to send His Son to the cross for my sake. Ok, I’ve got it – God gave humanity free will for one reason and one reason only: To Choose Him!

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